Just the Right Phantoms

by The Feature Creeps

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02:44
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02:19
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01:19
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credits

released December 3, 2013

Songs by Tom Vale © 2013 Uniform Songs

Troy Martin: Trombone on 6 & 9, ukulele on 11
Tony Mendoza: Drums on 3, 6, 7, 9, & 12
Matt Test: Banjo on 6 & 11

Recorded and mixed by Vale @ Uniform Sound Studio (Chicago IL and Warren RI)
Drums on 3, 6, 7, 9, & 12 recorded by John V. Forbes @ Frogg Mountain (Chicago IL)
Mastered by Carl Saff @ Saff Mastering (Chicago IL)
Artwork by Vale

Space, equipment, and patience:
Mike Canale & The Annoyance Theater (Chicago IL), John & Stephanie Shaterian, Tommy & Brittany Hillwertz, Troy Martin & Cat Jarboe, Joanna Buese, Tony Mendoza

Endless thanks to:
Tony Mendoza & Lauren Dowden, Greg & Esther Norman, The Nurse Novels, ElvisBride, Let’s Get Out of This Terrible Sandwich Shop, Civil Servant, family, Kate & Scout

© 2013 Uniform Sound Recordings (USR001)
All rights reserved

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about

The Feature Creeps Providence, Rhode Island

Rhode Island-based The Feature Creeps is homemade rock by Tom Vale of Chicago's The Nurse Novels, ElvisBride, and Let's Get Out of This Terrible Sandwich Shop.

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Track Name: Submarie
Let's take the high road we know
Under the radar wherever we go
Let's take the high road we know
Be you and me of a decade ago

Catch a wave to Nova Scotia
Just so long's we keep in motion
As the sun retreats we'll watch our shadows grow

Submarie, what's not to run to?
Submarie, nobody loves you like I do
Don't you let them keep me at home

Let's take the high road we know
Living on credit has taken its toll
Let's take the high road we know
Turn on a dime or pay what I owe

Maybe I'm a ne-er-do-well
Getting fat and fooling myself
Only you are too polite to tell me so

Submarie, what's not to run to?
Submarie, nobody loves you Like I do
Don't you let them keep me
Trying to keep me
Don't let them keep me at home
Track Name: Keeping Afloat
Whatever you have to say, make it loud
Preach it until they crack and cave and attend you
Better than banging away in a crowd
beating a path to stamp, fret, and rave at the menu

Left unto their own devices
Festering can turn to crisis
Don't ever mistake them for a ghost in glasses

Just relax
You shouldn't have to keep wind at their backs
maintaining order by phone or by fax
keeping them afloat

Better to keep it inside if you're down
for the mistakes that you can't save
Let them eat you
Down to the bone when you lie on the ground
We'll do a cute soft-shoe on their grave
Souls'll seep through

Left unto their own devices
Festering can turn to crisis
Don't ever mistake them for a ghost in glasses

Just relax
They're gonna crack when we give 'em the rack
pose for the camera then lower the axe
Piling their heads into copious stacks
keeping us afloat
Track Name: Wayward Ho!
Ready to see the world is small? (What do you say?)
Ready to see the world is small? (What do you say?)
It’s the backseat for the summer. (What do you say?)

Better to see what's going on. (What do you say?)
Better to see what's going on, (What do you say?)
’Cuz your teenage head is cluttered. (What do you say?)

Better turn around it could be your last chance to see the sky.
Get your head unburied or America will pass you by.
Hey we're having fun you know we'd really like to see you try.

Now that you sloughed us off again, (What do you say?)
Now that you sloughed us off again, (What do you say?)
For yourself and to your mother?
Track Name: I'll Pull the Wool
Leave this kind of work assigned to other people
Ain't that the least that they can give?
Just think how much it takes to budget time and keep it
Hey baby, that's no way to live.
It's not so long ago
You ran the show
Open your eyes
I'll pull the wool

Stature tells me that yours is a hand worth holding
Let's get your feelings off the fence
You've got half a mind to love your kind but that's unfolding
Who then'll come to your defense?
You don't want to know

They'll tell you when in Rome,
The more you've been the less you want to go
Let's set the facts in stone
The more you learn the less you want to know

But you're still half full
Open your eyes
I'll pull the wool

I'll reimburse whatever earth that you're the salt of
and individuate the skies
Fair is just whatever makes the mirror friendly
Don't let it come as a surprise
I'll make it so
Track Name: Might As Well
I’ve got tons of baggage that I can’t defend
I have sins that guarantee I’ll get it in the end
But if I know one thing I’ve been on the mend
Since my memory started going soft
My road looks higher from where I stand
Ground is soft but it hardens over time
And up my sleeve are gimmicks just enough
Just enough to cross the finish line
It’s too late now to try the harder sell
Well, it’s hard to believe but I might as well

The air is sticky; thick with static, too
Hazy so it’s getting hard to see
Took me this long just to realize
All the things I’ve done are being done to me

My bones are weaker but I’m not through yet
There are still some sins I always wanted to commit
If I have to settle for the hand I get
Then I won’t have to play it very long
I’ve been looking on the way downhill
For an end that’ll justify the means
And now my vantage point is clear, self-assured,
And confident like me at seventeen
It’s too late now to try the harder sell
Well, it’s hard to believe but I might as well
Track Name: Do the Settle Down
Do the settle down
Get domestic on the dance floor
Do the settle down
Put your feet on the ground permanently or
Until each day gets in the way

Do the settle down
Get in debt on the dance floor
Do the settle down
Get the things that you found lacking before
You grow too old and dinner’s cold

Do the settle down
Throw your weight on the dance floor
Do the settle down
There’ll be no one around – to even the score
Or cause you doubt or call you out

Everything you do to keep you on your toes
Always someone you’re disturbing I suppose
Navigating through an archipelago of foes you owe

Do the settle down
Get domestic on the dance floor
Do the settle down
Put your feet on the ground permanently or
Until each day gets in the way
You’ll be okay
Anyway we’re gonna look the other way
Track Name: Don't Fool Yourself
One fat wish isn't all I'm asking, I'm light years beyond
I've been hit with a work-sick feeling right where I belong

I don't spend karma saved for something else
Don't wait for luck, no, please don't fool yourself

I'd sell out given half a chance and burn a bridge or two
Desperate times never swim upstream against Fifth Avenue

Stop spending karma saved for something else
Don't wait for nothing, please don't fool yourself

I've got a weakness for the shrill
It's got its hooks inside me still
It's got me me sizing up the shill always approaching me.
It feeds on every breed I know
It holds me upright through the show: the stage that's coaching me

I've hit ground with my head buried in midwestern sand
Put this down as a debit while I siphon what I can

Stop spending karma saved for something else
Don't take the weight off, leave it on the shelf
Don't wait for nothing, please don't fool yourself

I've got a weakness for the shrill
It's got its hooks inside me still
It's got me sizing up the shill always approaching me.
It feeds on every breed I know
It holds me upright through the show: the stage that's coaching me

It drags me up and down the hall
It's got me screening every call
and looking lively to a fault while playing wait and see
It likes to kick out of the way
The things I'm seeing every day
It meets my master plan halfway
Track Name: In Your Way
If you’re coming clean
Don’t make them believe it
And if they don’t, that’s your cue.
From the evidence I’ve seen,
This much is conceded:
They want to be just like you
Splitting the difference
Sporting a dark-sunglass disguise
And all of ‘em are in the way
Of ever coming clean

If you’re coming clean
Don’t give up your secrets
Unless the company you keep
Is splitting the difference
Lost in a dark-sunglass disguise
Cuz all of ‘em are in your way
Track Name: Bubblegum Row
Yep, I brake for a clean escape
and beat myself into fighting shape
It’s hell not knowing what to flex
as I prep and launch into a hex attack
And make a self-fulfilling prophecy defining every state I'm in

If you swear to be everywhere
I’ll set the pace to the dogged chase
and take the baton, no looking back
another time around the track

And I have almost got your back on Bubblegum Row

It's a scream, put your tongue in cheek and
make a scene. Hangin' man is
dealt from the bottom of the deck
So pay respect to the hometown ref
“Chance is slim,” said to him
on a sliding scale or biting nails
or any other state I’m in

Run run run from the bridal army, run
On a scale of one to ten I think I’m gonna throw up
on the sun
But I’m still learning how to live
Track Name: Trouble Is I'll Probably Stay Around
Your best-laid plans will crumble
Your lofty ideals corrupt
Your heroes disappoint you
Little babies, they all grow up
The whitest whites get dirty
The deepest black will fade
The stars will all shine down on you
With the history that you’ve made
And they know you’ll never outrun them
They’ll expose you wherever you go
And it’s more than just gravity
That keeps a good man down
Trouble is I’ll probly stay around

Your memory’s a street-hardened hustler
Who charms as he empties your cup
The history you learned was all fiction
The numbers you know don’t add up
And a lover will whisper sweet nothings
To appease all the dreams in your head
You’ll ask for a warm heart for Christmas
But you’ll get a new sweater instead
And you go to bed with a good idea
And you wake up with Roy Cohn
I hope your best intentions
Never fall on fertile ground
Trouble is I’ll probly stay around

And my darling you know that I love you
From my smile to my new pair of shoes
And there’ll still be room at the table
No matter how much money you lose
I’ll always keep it between us, though
We both know who blew the game
And I did my part by looking for
And assigning the blame
These words don’t reflect your condition
You’re entirely catastrophe-prone
When even daytime celebrities say
“Don’t let the sun set on you in this town”
Trouble is I’ll probly stay around

So ring a bell for my benediction
As the sun’s tucked away for the night
I’ll dream when my head hits the pillow
That your faults will all be put right
And the calendar’s days are numbered
The day comes when you’ll have to choose
The path of least resistance
Or the path no one could refuse
But all of my prayers can’t save you
From who or what follows you home
It’s not just the feeling that’s sinking
We’d better head for higher ground
Trouble is I’ll probly stay around
Track Name: Better the First Time
Stumbled on the fine line
Between good and alright
Workshop dread and off with its head, cuz
It was better the first time
Lesson learned and outlined
Mapping every downside
Zip my lip like a mobius strip, cuz
It was better the first time

It’s a little bit shot and a little uphill
And it’s gonna go south until I’ve got to

Catch up to the deadline
Like a flower to sunshine
There's no doubt it'll psych me out, cuz
It was better the first time
Mastered every bird’s eye
Expert-read and tongue-tied
Open my mouth, let it all pour out, but
It was better the first time

It’s a little bit shot and a little uphill
And it’s gonna go south until I’ve got to row

My track is on the decline
Creeping to the coastline
It’s too late for an elegant state, cuz
It was better the first time
Not one loose end is untied
Nothing left to streamline
Yeah, perhaps it’ll never collapse, but
It was better the first time

It’s a little bit shot and a little uphill
And it’s gonna go south until I’ve got to row
Track Name: Just the Right Phantoms
I felt a phantom doggedly
Take offense and pull the string right out of me.
Her voice a shiver in the trees
Telling me that good and bad things come in threes.

In a room in a house I would know,
I’ve a reasoned superstition; retroactive premonition.
On the lip of a lie, even though
I’m a fool for even caring; all the Jesus people staring.

We’ll get no time anymore.
There is no time to determine,
No time to believe in everyone.

And when I shuffle off my shell,
Is it winning or a loss? It’s hard to tell.

I miss all the seasons when the shore had gone away. I know, I know.
I can’t tell the either from the or; it’s all a grey. I know, I know.
I missed all the reasons to ignore all you say. I know, I know.

I guess I’ll have to make up my mind
Whether I can weather sticking to a plan, and
She isn’t gonna be undermined
By a spineless kid playing every side he can, yeah.

I hope that phantom augurs well
And the wind hits through a wall that you know well

Out here my tongue is tied
And the mood swings to the right.
Your dreams are all decided,
Come inside, you’re still invited to mine.

Inflated to supersize
To take on ten or twenty guys;
With loyalties divided,
Paid in kind, till day and night collide.

Are we not men sometimes?
Throwing in with better guys?
And devising just the proper phantoms in disguise?

She’s attaching to my spine,
Sending phantom valentines.
I’m almost too lovesick to drop the stick and run inside.

I’m the poster of surprise;
When I’m falling from the sky
I’ll be riding with just the right phantoms by my side.